CB#34
July 2008
Moving In
“Home is where we are.” – Lori Puente
Moving In
I have finally arrived in California. I don’t know how to describe the feelings I’m having about what was to be a fun grand adventure. It is still an adventure to be sure, but not at all how we imagined it when it all started last year. I find myself working to calm the hysteria I feel at times with all the many things I can have my attention on. What will happen to us, how will this end up, all my friends back east, all my friends from childhood out west, our new home, doctors, treatment, Dave’s job, the kids, the move, the boxes (oh man the boxes!), my hat turnover, and on and on. Many of these things would be going on if all things were “normal”, but it just seems overwhelming if I really LOOK at it. So, while I don’t bury my head in the sand, I try really hard to just focus on what I can, what is the priority of the moment and know, as my mother used to say, “that other stuff will still be there, waiting for you!”
When I arrived at the airport, it was incredibly sweet to me that Dave insisted on coming in to get me. This is not typical for us. We are the drive by at 5 mph and kick you out the door kind of people at airports and bus terminals. Waiting in lots for the phone call that you have retrieved your bag and creep up the curb until we see you and slow down for you to jump in. So I was really moved that Dave was “coming in” to get me at the baggage claim, which was quickly dashed when I saw him moving slowly through the terminal, emaciated and weak. How my heart fell. Hudson standing proudly and stoically next to him and Dave with a broad and loving smile. What do you do? You put on your best face and you let them know, not your fear, but your love and how happy you are to see them! Sigh…
Dave’s folks would be arriving and then the movers, then Hudson leaving to go back east for the car and Kip, and, and, and… Hitting the ground running. It seems like I am running full tilt everyday. I can’t stop and think about it, I just have to keep going, doing the best I can and hopeful others will do their part as well.
All the usual…
Parents, check.
Movers, check.
Telephone, check.
Internet, check.
Toilet Paper, check.
Kitchen, check.
Sheets, check.
Groceries, check.
Ok, we’re good. (Not necessarily in that order)
The days were long and Dave was having both physical and emotional discomfort. He didn’t have a room to go lay down and take a nap as we were really in the throws of moving in. Sometimes a bed, or a chair, or a couch just wouldn’t work for him and having things stable enough for him to adjust his position was still in mid-air. We missed Dan & Sarah and still had stuff at their house to get moved out. Dave’s parents were wonderfully helpful, Dave managed to go to work for a couple of hours and we are getting some sense of order and cooking is occurring. We met our immediate neighbor, complete with four kids and a lab..emmmm nice.
I went out in the car to run some errands when suddenly I realized I not only had no idea where I was going or was, but I couldn’t find Dave’s car in the parking lot! I’m a mess at times, but I’m learning to let it all go and just go with the flow. I did find the drug store, the car, and my way home. Success! I’ll take it.
