Riding The Wave – Multiple Myeloma

“To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today” – Anonymous

What a wonderful trip I had in Maryland visiting our daughter Montana. She was an athlete for four years at Maryland and was giving a little speech at the year end swim and dive banquet. It coincided with our trip to Little Rock, so Dave went home and put me on a plane for College Park. I stayed with Montana at her sorority house, AOPII (Alpha Omicron Pi), with 47 residents, a house mother and her little dog, Luda. It’s a lovely old mansion right off the campus. They have a cook and large open common areas for the girls to hang out, watch TV, chat, and quiet library areas to do homework. By the time I left, I knew how to make the coffee and found the creamers! The girls are delightful and lovely and I kept wondering if I was ever that young and up

that late! I would be fading fast and they were just getting ready to go out, at 11 pm! The high heels, the short skirts, it was all very entertaining. Coming down in my jammies Saturday morning to see several boys passed out on the very large (seats 27) sectional couch in the family room was funny. Boys are allowed in sororities these days. So of course, being ever the female, once I knew the opposite sex was in the vicinity, I was sneaking around to get my coffee and back upstairs as I was not very presentable in my bed head and jammies, and certainly not nearly as cute as the girls when they are padding around in the morning. 🙂

I spent one day with Montana at her new job/internship, that she will most likely be working for when she graduates. Then we went to her second job at White House/Black Market, a women’s clothing store. She had called her father and gotten money from him to buy me some new clothes for Mother’s Day and my birthday in May. I don’t like to shop for clothes. In fact, most of the time I hate it. So when I do shop, I tend to come home with armfuls of clothes so I don’t have to do it again for as many years as possible. As a result I don’t tend to buy trendy things. Evidently, both of my children hate this about me and have had discussions about it. “Mom isn’t feminine enough. Mom always wears slacks,” and on and on. So while Montana was doing her job and having fun, I felt a little tortured. However, she was having such a good time, that I must admit, I enjoyed myself. Maybe I just have to shop with her from now on. Every time I would feel like I was making headway in the dressing room having tried on this or that that she insisted I put on, she would come in with another armful! She is very good at her job, though, I must say. She was very sensitive to colors I liked, styles I enjoyed and then pushed me outside of my comfort zone here and there. All the other girls got involved, along with the manager, and all contributed to making me feel comfortable. It’s a young “hip” shop and so it was challenging. Having said all of that, success in some cool new clothes did occur. Montana was very happy. A dress she picked out for me she knew I would love and I did. I have always loved the 1950s era dresses. They just fit my body type in a very flattering way. I used to actually shop at 2nd hand stores to find these dresses and still have a couple of them in my closet. When I put it on with an adorable cream shrug that matched the trim I felt like I was in a Doris Day/Rock Hudson movie! I just needed the big brimmed hat, sunglass and gloves!

Then a colorful, flowered skirt. Totally NOT ME! But Montana insisted. It was fun and flirty and so cute she said. So, the other girls jumped in and helped me to pair it with a white under top and a coral 1940s style sweater and whalah! I’m OK with it. They didn’t have my size so she will order it for me on line.

I found a great pair of jeans there. They have the #1 fitting jean right now. They have different names in the styles so you can figure out which named jean is the one that fits your body type and then just look for that in all the different jeans. Very cool. But the one I wanted was in a size that the manager, Montana and the other girls said I could not have. It was too big and too baggy. “But I like my jeans loose,” I said. Sorry not happening, “they will be falling off you by the end of the day,” they insisted… So a smaller size is on-order.

Anyway, four hours later I was absolutely exhausted. We got locked in the mall and that started to feel like we were in a really bad horror movie. We finally found the employee exit, which took us into the bowels of the mall and I said, “Now this is really getting scary!” We had a great laugh and were happy to find our way out!

Montana did a great job on her speech. It is quite an accomplishment for a Division I athlete to make it all four years in a sport. They had a rough beginning with the head coach announcing at the opening lunch he was leaving for another coaching job. Many of these kids came to Maryland because of him. It was incredibly destabilizing and viewed, rightly, as incredibly unprofessional. So with their first year in Swim/Dive without a head coach, and no diving coach, it was tough. The kids that were left standing at the end of the four years deserve medals just for sticking it out and graduating! I was very proud of all of them.

I was incredibly touched that she ended her speech with my quote through this journey of Multiple Myeloma:

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass. It’s about learning to dance in the rain!”

When I think about all that she has accomplished, and our son Hudson. I am so impressed at how well our children continued with their lives, their education, their endeavors, despite that their parents moved away during their college experience AND their Dad being diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma! There is much to be proud of about these two young people, and of course, the fact that they are our children, makes it all the sweeter for us. We are proud beyond words.

Montana is now officially retired!

WAY TO GO MONTANA!

PS, Additionally, I pounded around the campus and saw my boss, co-workers and friends, and helped two families visiting the campus find their way to the Visitor center for a walking tour. It was wonderful, felt like old times! They were all inquiring about Dave and sending their regards. I ran into a few of our PhD students who will wind up their dissertations this spring. I’m so proud of them. We will head back next month for Montana’s graduation. We are feeling pretty accomplished. Did I mention I was exhausted? This is the stuff that makes Myeloma take a back seat and we are pushing for it to get in the trunk under the spare tire, covered with a tarp, with cobwebs and spiders!

Tags: montana, Terps, University of Maryland, Visit