CB #14
While all this is going on on the West Coast, I learned that my incredible friends and neighbors were rallying around and organizing a “packing” schedule. When I got home I had troops of friends all doing something and coming over here and there to help me pack 27 years of CRAP for the movers. The more I packed, the more money I saved, we had a cap on our relo package and we desperately needed to do as much ourselves as we could to get under the cap. We had it all planned of course and then I was in California dealing with Dave, instead of at home dealing with the packing, which Dave was going to be helping with.
One of the things that is hard for “able” people to learn how to do is ALLOW others to help. We are the helpers, we don’t need help. Fortunately, in caring for my mother I learned how to let things go and accept assistance. But for those of you ABLE folks who suddenly find yourself in this medical crisis, and you aren’t used to letting people help you, suck it up! Learn fast, on the fly. Its not going to be perfect and it won’t be the way you would do it, SO WHAT! Its help and you have to take a different point of view. I can manage dammit, so that’s what I did. I directed and organized things so that others could do it. Whatever they did would be well meaning and have to suffice. At least it would get to the other end and I would deal with it there. You know what? They did a FANTASTIC job. All of them. The boxes made sense, they were labeled and I had very little if any breakage. I couldn’t have done it without them, no way, no how. Well, maybe I could of, but I probably would have ended up in a funny farm.
Good people want to help. Let them. You would do it for them right? Well let them do it for you. Its a universal exchange. I have helped people my whole life. Its what my family always did, I learned it. Its second nature. Now it was time for me to cash in and the trick is to recognize that and then accept it, graciously and gratefully.
