My Mom in her late 20's, 1960s era
“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born.” – Rajneesh
Happy Mother’s Day to everyone. A lovely day of sharing or remembering our mothers. I often remember not just my own, but all those who “mothered me” along the way. Their nurturing, their care, their hugs, their advice, their laughter.
My mother passed away in 2001 from cancer. I cared for her in my home the remaining months of her life and did a lot of caring and advocating for her long before then. I continue to miss her as certain milestones and difficulties come into my life. But I am emboldened by the blessings of all that she shared with me over the years.
Ours was a relationship of great difficulty the first 20 years of my life. We managed to turn the tide on that in my early 20s and it was so magnificent that it dwarfed the hardships of the first 20 years. Another testament, to my belief, that people can and do change, and relationships can be so much more than anyone allowed you to believe. Miracles do exist and ours was one of those miracles. Once I believed we would never be friends, and when I decided that indeed we could be, and it was worth our efforts to work in that direction, our lives changed for the better. It wasn’t one sided, we both agreed and we both worked toward that end. But it definitely started with me changing my mind about what could be. Forgiving myself for not trying to understand her. Empathizing with her burdens as someone who had matured.
Hers was an interesting life and one with many things to overcome as she became a Lieutenant’s wife at the age of 19 and had me when she was 20. I wasn’t able to fully appreciate those obstacles until I had matured. Once I began to appreciate these things as a young adult, overcoming my own obstacles in life, our relationship began to blossom and grow. She was outspoken, gracious, generous, rowdy, independent, sensitive, strong, courageous and sometimes insecure. Like me, she always had “a story” to tell. Often long, but always funny and meaningful. She was a great friend and citizen.
I miss her.
Happy Mother’s Day Mom and Thank You!
Thank you ladies!
It is truly amazing what forgiveness can do!
what you wrote about your mom, lori, was so inspiring. i’m sure that, though you weren’t able to have as many years with her as you both wished for, your care, love, and advocacy for her at the end of her life created an almost magical cycle that enabled and empowered you to be the extraordinary caregiver you have been for dave. what a wonderful gift she left behind – and one that just keeps on giving when you reach out to offer a loving embrace via your posts to share your knowledge and experiences with us, to light our way through struggles in myelomaville, reassure us, and offer us hope.
What a sweet tribute Lori; thanks for sharing.